I’m getting an oil change. I’m trying not to feel fear in this moment. Lots of people do this dance and get their vehicle worked on. I’m not the only one. The people ahead of me probably had to wait just like I am. They probably have shit they want to get done just like me. I’m going to wait patiently and everything is going to be okay.

I waited like 2 minutes. This place kicks ass! I always come here. Proformance auto on Sprague near Pines. They are always fast here. Maybe too fast. Nah, I appreciate their speed.

Oh so… I don’t know why I started this sentence this way. I just finished therapy. It was alright. We talked about my anxiety and I figured out that i am not very good at celebrating my successes. I am going to make it a habit of journalling my successes. Imight as well start now here at the oil change place.

I was able to stave off a panic attack just now, as I waited in line for an oil change. I have learned taht I’m not the only one who suffers from anxiety. This fact actually helps. I didn’t think such a thing could be comforting. I didn’t think practicing love and kindness would help either. Truth is, I’m learning all sorts of new ideas which are eaach helping me become a better person and a little closer to my goals.

I wouldn’t be surprised if the behavioral health place discharged me because I haven’t been as depressed as I was when I first joined. I hope they don’t, though, as I have a lot more work to do to reach my goal of being able to positively interact with people.

My goodness, my breath stinks. I don’t have any mouthwash… I should pick some up on my next trip to the grocery store.

It smells like candles in this waiting area. I wonder how much this oil change will cost I’m hoping $39.95 as advertized for their full service oil change.

I gotta pee. I’m going to hold it. Shouldn’t be much longer. I hear a pumping sound. I’m eager to get home and check out my ebay sales.

Dirty jobs with Mike Rowe or whoever is playing ohn the TV here. That dude’s voice is so iconic.. I just heard my suburban start up. Anyone want to buy a suburban? For sale! I’ll make you a deal! $1500 or best offer! I am wanting to get rid of it so I can stop paying for auto insurance. I didn’t list it on craigslist as I had planned. I did take pictures, so that’s a success for sure.

I’ve made 3 card sales this week, and I have another 2 pending card sales.

I’m at home now. Those pending sales are now final! I’ll be shipping them out soon.

I am thinking that my Paypal account is now my business account. I think that will make managing my money slightly easier. When I withdraw from Paypal, that’s a paycheck. I’m going to treat it that way in YNAB, anyway.

Ok so I just spent $112 on shipping for the four card lot purchaes I made via buyee. I wonder if I could have saved money had I not consolidated them all into one package. Maybe next time I will take a little extra time and figure out which one is more cost effective.

The nice thing is that the box is going to be sent via EMS, which is going to be a lot faster than the freight ship method which was offered yet half the price. I ain’t got time to wait 6 weeks or whatever it was. EMS is going to be 4-8 days which is really nice. That means I should have the cards probably the week after next.

Yesterday I opened an entire booster box of Weiss Schwarz Project DIVA f [English Edition.] I sleeved all the cards and sorted them then went through and listed everything on eBay. I would go through each card, and if I didn’t have a photo, I’d just add it to a stack and come back to that stack later and take pictures.

It’s work, that’s for sure. My brain was fried at the end of the day, and I couldn’t list anymore even though I wanted to get started on another box.

I did get started on another box. I got as far as opening all the packs and sleeving all the cards.

Out of both boxes I opened en-masse, it seems that each contains 1 signed card, and 1 foil card, plus the four promo cards which come with each box. I’ve sold a few cards already, and each time I’m amazed and thankful that people are willing to pay close to what I’m asking. $3 a card seems to be a popular amount for cards, and I gladly accept when people make a purchase in that amount.

I think I did something bad the other day. I mailed two cards without rigid protection. I usually will put some cardboard in a bubble mailer along with the cards which I enclose in a kraft paper envelope. I sent two double sleeved cards in that kraft envelope inside an outer mailing evelope… I don’t want to make that a habit. I want my habit to be to either send the card in a toploader, or send the card with a rigid piece of cardboard.

I’ve been collecting advertisement cardboard which comes with credit cards. It’s really just a piece of thick paper which is meant to advertise some feature of the credit card, but I don’t even read it. I’ve just been looking forward to such spam mail so I can get free shipping material!

I’m doing okay, money wise. Well, I mean I’m doing okay right in this moment. Once I pay may auto insurance bill, I’m going to be broke again.

I think the card shop can work, if I just keep working really hard. I’m getting sales and I appreciate my customers a lot. I’m making progress at expanding my inventory and I think I can make this work…

I still need to lower my expenses. I think the quickest, easiest, best method for doing that is to get rid of my vehicle. It’s going to suck. It’s really going to suck not being able to simply get in a warm, enclosed vehicle and travel somewhere. However, I think there is a lifestyle worth exploring by doing so. Bicycling everywhere is a fantastic activity. it will keep me young. It will keep me thin. It will promote my health.

On that note, I’m going to go ahead and list the Suburban.

Holy shit, Craigslist charges for vehicle listings now!

I just listed my Suburban. I don’t know what I’m doing now. It’s almost 2PM and I have game group in 1.5 hours. I want to eat or workout or both, but I’ll have to shower if I workout. I walked like 5 laps this morning, I need 15 more. It would be so much easier if Friday was my cheat day… Perhaps I’ll move my cheat day to Friday to cope with the amount of things going on.

I just touched my face. I’m going to get coronavirus now. Why do I joke like this? COVID-19 was declared a pandemic yesterday. Or was it two days ago? I’m just annoyed at the freakout that is going on. Everything is getting cancelled, from comic book conventions to gun shows to schools to offices. I think it was Minnesota where K-12 schools are getting shut down. The disease awareness guy on Joe Rogan said closing schools should not happen because that will only harm the economy.

It’s interesting to see what the fear is doing to people. I’m choosing to not be afraid. I’m simply annoyed.

I should probably eat something. I’m thinking it might be a bad idea to eat before playing games, so I might just go for the snacks they have there, and not eat prior… Actually I think that might be a really bad idea. What if they are out of those delicious fig snacks that I usually go for? It’s a gamble and a risk if I show up on an empty stomach. I’d rather not be suffering during the whole experience because I refused to take care of myself beforehand…

Hmm. When I put it like that, I feel totally guilty. It’s my job to take care of myself, not the behavioral health clinic. It’s my job to exercise and be well. They just help me with strategies and shit, but I’m the one who has to do the work.

Ok then, how can we go about this. It’s 2PM right now. 1:58 to be exact. I can heat up some water and have some oatmeal with raisins. That makes a good snack. I could eat a mandarin orange as well, that’s an okay snack.

Hmm, that’ll take about 15 minutes to warm up. Then I guess I could go walk outside until 3PM. I wouldn’t get super sweaty if I just walk, so I could leave promptly at 3:05PM and be early for group. That’s a pretty decent plan.

In the future, I’ll be on bicycle. I’ll have to leave at least an hour in advance to be early to group. That’ll be interesting, and sometimes annoying because of the extra work required to prepare and travel.

It’s nothing new. I’ve been a cyclist in the past. My fondest memory of being a cyclist was riding to Putters every day. 2.8 miles one way is the distance. My new distance for here in Spokane is going to be 5.3 miles one way. But that’s not an every day thing, It’s a twice a week thing. 2.8 miles seemed like

OMG I can imagine how fit my legs are going to get. That will be great for Tae Kwon Do!

I’m going to need some back and arm exercises though, to keep my body strength even. I don’t want to lose the biceps I’ve been working on by doing pushups.

I’m going to wrap up writing now, and continue when I get back from game day.

Oh shit, I think I’m getting calls about the Suburban already…

Game day @ FBH. I think I might quit coming to game group. Maybe. If I have to bicycle to here twice a day, on Friday, that’s probably too much. Some dude offered me $500 for my Suburban. Fuck that. I think I played my hand too early. He asked me over the phone what my bottom dollar was. I said $1000 and the dude offered $500. Fuck!

No way. A mountain bike is worth $500, and that’s a really shitty mountain bike. I think my suburban is worth at least 2 shitty mountain bikes.

I also have to consider the montly cost of auto insurance. It’s going to be $200 a month for that.

I don’t think I can do it. I don’t think I can sell my Suburban. I want to drop it off somewhere and get a shitty deal, rather than going through the process of negotiating. I pulled the listing from CL. I’m probably going to regret it. Maybe I should just donate it to charity.

I think I should just take the $500. I can’t do it though. I can’t meet with a stranger and do the deal. Last time I did that, I got fucked over, taking a measly $500 for my Honda Civic which was worth more than that. And the guy insulted me to my face. “You’re a boring motherfucker.”

I’m going to get shafted and I can’t stand up for myself, so the Suburban is going nowhere. I’m not selling it.

Kelly’s Blue Book says trade in value is $360 – $663. I should take the $500 but I’m too afraid to meet with a stranger. Fuck me.

You know what? He’s probably the type of dude that would offer me even less once he sees it. Just fuck that. Fuck that noise. It’s going to charity, or it’s going to sit there.