Mon Aug 3 2020

M. is coming to Spokane! I’m excited but I’m also a bit nervous that I won’t have time to list on eBay while I’m doing stuff with M.

Heh… Who am I kidding. I have such an abundance of time that I will have no problem getting everything done, and have plenty of time to hang out with M.

Well today I sold a bunch of cards. 4 orders consisting of 2 booster packs, and 14 singles. Total roughly around $70. I’m really pleased about that. Off to a good start for August!

The numbers are in for July sales. $1616.20 gross! It’s around $900 net. Holy shit, dude. I was thinking that July was a terrible month, but once again I am pleased to say that July is my best sales month yet!

I am so confused because I had so many days where there was zero activity in my store. I felt like I was failing somehow.

Well, shit.

Reality is strange, my dude!

Remember how at the start of the month, I had a total of 8 items? I wonder how my sales would have been if I hadn’t downsized my 3000 listings at all?

I suppose that’s probably not a healthy thing to ponder on. Sure, I regret downsizing to 8 items when I didn’t need to, but I want to think that there was something good that came from it.

I learned 3D Sellers platform. That’s a plus. I learned some dangerous quirks in 3D sellers which I can avoid in the future, such as how it’s really easy to accidentally do a bulk operation on every item in inventory rather than just a filtered few.

I had the opportunity to reorganize my whole card inventory. I had this organization scheme jostling around in my mind which I put into action, and now that I’ve done it, I know it’s not a good idea because it adds unnecessary complexity.

I found this complex way of organizing, I tried it, applied it to a relatively small number of cards, and now I know that it’s a bad idea and I won’t be using it in the future. It’s better to fail when the stakes are small!

This month is August and I’m starting strong. I had a nice sale to get the first Monday of the month started, I have 1212 items in stock, I have no barriers to selling this month, I have four boxes of unlisted cards to either bundle or list as singles, there’s an upcoming stimulus package which will incentivise my customers…

It’s going to be a great month!

M. texted me about his ongoing trip. He’s in Missoula, MT for the night and he said he hit a jackrabbit on the freeway in UT. FeelsBadMan. I hit and killed a cat near Chewelah several years back, and I felt horrible about it.

I felt horrible, but I remember telling the story to the airsoft guy. I told the story like a joke which I have regrets about. But I know I did so not because I found it funny, but because of how it was an uncomfortable thing to talk about.

“How was the drive?”

“I only killed one cat on the way here!”

Another thing I have regrets about was not reacting to the cat who ran into the road. I wasn’t sure what to do so I just kept driving. Then I heard a thud and that cat was definitely dead.

I thought about that after the fact. I resolved to respond in the future to something like that. EMERGENCY BREAKING is the correct response, which I resolved to do should a similar situation arise.

Similar situations have arisen since then, and I was much happier about how I handled those situations. Deer and birds, mostly. I can remember close calls with birds, but usually I see the deer so far in the distance to where there’s plenty of time for me to slow down.

Life is fragile, my dude!

I remember when J.’s dad was killed in a work accident. I was in the way too hot server closet at I.C., doing work on my computer. I received a text from my dad with the news.

I didn’t know what to think. I had never had the experience before to where I was notified that an acquaintance had died.

I felt horrible and I wondered to myself, “what do I do? What can I do?”

I came to the conclusion that all I can do is to keep moving forward.

So it’s 4:03AM on monday. Today I have a Zoom call with my therapist at 9AM. I did all the homework except for 1 thing, which is to research Byron Katie’s the work. I will do that now.

Ok then. I filled it out but I didn’t really answer the questions. Fuck it. All I can think about right now is smoothies.

I am thinking of riding down to the grocery store once the sun comes up, and getting a few bags of frozen fruit.


I just gotta keep in mind my monthly food budget of $15 per week. Basically that’s like two bags of frozen fruit and that’s it. For the ENTIRE WEEK.

I don’t actually need to buy food right now. I have oatmeal, rice and peanut butter, squash and potatos, nuts and dried fruit. If I buy no food at all, I’m set for the week.

But that’s not going to happen. I’ve been hooked by the tasty allure of the all mighty fruit smoothie. I think I’m going to feed two birds with one scone, get my morning exercise and get some fruit.

I’m STOKED for the upcoming delicious and nutritious treat!

I checked suntimes and it looks like 5:30 this morning is when the sun will be up. I think traffic should be super low right around then as well, which will make the ride more enjoyable.

I should say that the sunrise is at 5:30. The sun will be, “up” at 6.

So maybe I’ll wait a little longer? IDK IDK IDK.

Ok flow time. No censoring and just write whatever comes to your head, you fuck!

This is the time to get the ideas and the thoughts and the feelings out on paper. This is the Writer’s way. Oh, should I do hemengway mode or wahtever, where the backspace is disabled? I could physically pop out my backspace. Or maybe there’s a wordpress plugin for that?

I don’t see one. Well, I’ll just mentally block out the backspace button for this time.

I just used it. It is second nature to use that button.

Oh hey, I’ll just write in Ghostwriter and then copy-paste it into wordpress once I’m done.

Ok mr. Ghostwriter, we are in hemingway mode. There is no backspace available!!!

This forces me to not double thingk things. I can’t go back. this is a TYPEWRITER where the ink is applied directly to the page at the time of kepypress!

I end up witlh all sorts of funny mistakes this way. Toypos left and right!

I ven put a typo in the word typo! Hahhaahahah!

So M. send sent me a video of his dashcam when he hit a rabbit. Blood slpattered all over the windshield. OMG! The bunny could have lived if it hkept running, but it came to a stop right in from nt of M.’s car. Poor bunny.

I remember now. I honk at deer if they cross in front of me. The lights are enough toput them into a trance, but a honk is enough to snap them back into their running from danger mode.

Did you ever notice that Miku’s face and Luka’s face are a lot similar? Their eyes looks the same in Project DIVA F 2nd. It’s like the designers just recolored the eyes and changed the face just a tiny bit. I think ku Luka’s face might be a little wider than miku’s . but they’re so similar! Ahhhg I don’t like how they’re so similar!!

If they’re sysisters they’re okay. But I don’t know if they’re sisters. They’re definitely not sisters. Well, it’s not like there is a se t cannon in that rarea of VOCALOID story.

In ACUTE (the manga) Luka and Miku are pretty much sisters, even though they are not related bly by blood. They’re together in an orphangage or something. I think KAITO is with them too, and thye’re all the best buds. that is until they get older and start having feelings for eachother. That’s when it all goes down hill… DUN DUN DINNN!!


Wow, it is _really_ easy to make mistakes . I make the m contantly! I do so much editing of my words using backspace that it’s just second nature. This Hemingway mode rallly shows me how many mistakes I make!

I suppose I probably type to o fast. I don’t really have a buffer of when my thoughts are in my head . they just go atraight to my fingers and the errors i mn my head just get manifested as typos. Normally I can fix that witha backspace, but not in Hemingway mode!

Why don’t more editors hav te this mode? I t’s kickass for getting ideas down on paper. I guess I’m thinking about typos so much that I’m making more typos than I would be making than if i just got out of my own way and typed what I was thinking.

See , that wasn’t so bad. I doidn’t have so many typos that last paaragraph.

Interesting mode of writing. BLAZE THE TRAIL! that’s what it feels like. We aren’t going for perfection here, wer’re going tfor WRITING. Get that concept out!

I’m going to use this editor when I do NaNo WriMo this year. It’s going to be a real challenge, but I like challenges and I want to write another lnovel!

I also want to make a video game. I hope to do that in October wfor LDJAM.

I worked ojn my video game ysterday. I spent lot s of hours and I overdid it.

I do not code responsibly, i realize that now. I code for like 1 h 16 hours straight and i don’ t take enough breaks. I get in this minsdspace where everything is running a billion milses an hour and I can’t focus anymore. My brain is trying to do sseventeen things at once, and failing to make any progress.

It’s not the right way to code. Maybe LDJam is not a good idea for me because of how bad I am at moderating my work load.

The right way to do it is to spend an hour or two every day. The wrong way is to JAM.

Maybe I’ll make a card game or something. Something with simple rules and LOTS of art.

idk. Maybe I’ll get the code in place over a long time, then I can spend the JAM douing art assets and player models.

My game yetesterday was gtting so laggy. I think I need to figure out webworkers to handle the things that need to run in the background but shouldn’t take framewrates away from the 3d rendering.

idk. there’s too much too learn. I need a dev environment that doesn’t let me do stupid shit that causes performance issues. If I can do stupid shit, I’m going to do stupid shit.

Playcanvas eseens mis nicse, but it’s got limitation in what I can do with speech to text. I basically have to impolement that in a separate webpage, but doing so causes performance hiccups anthat are unacceptable to me.

If I’m going to make a 3d game, it has to run on a 10 yaer old computer without any problem. I can’t stand games that are poorly poptimized and run with low framerates on something that it should handle effortlessly.

Ok that Hemingway mode is nice, but it pretty much requires an immediate edit as I make so many mistakes. LOL that’s just crazy.

Ok well I have 100 extra words to type before I get to 2000 words. I haven’t got to 2000 words in what feels like weeks.

I suppose I’ll end with AFFIRMATIONS because I haven’t done those in awhile. I’m just going to make some shit up rather than use the list of 100 that I have gone through 2+ times.

  • I’m a poop head
  • I’m a tortoise
  • I’m a cathoder

those were dumbo.


I wanna go do eBay stuff.

My imagination is stagnant right now because all I can think of are fruit smoothies. So I guess I will use the list after all.

16. I matter.
17. I can find peace through prayer and meditation.
18. I am stronk.

I’m grateful that my friend M. is coming to spokane to visit.

I’m grateful that I get to become an uncle.

I’m grateful that I can ride to the grocery store whenever I want.

Looking for VOCALOID trading cards?

Check out Sakura Blossom Trading Post