Mon Mar 23 2020

I was a bad boy last night. I stayed up till 6AM doing the most bullshit thing ever. I had the bright idea to make make my own torrent seedbox. What a waste of time!

I call it bullshit because I already have an ansible script which spins up a deluge seedbox on vultr. It’s misbehaving, so instead of identifying and fixing the problem, I start building a node app which has a simple web interface that allows me to upload torrent files. My idea was to make a node app that detects changes in an upload folder, after which it will send the filename to aria2c.

There’s already an aria2c web interface, but I didn’t find that out until I got the part where I had to have my node server send the filename to an aria2c child process.

I wasn’t making good use of my time, I was just getting high. I was being an internet addict and the time I spent was fruitless– I have half a shitty product and setting it up takes longer than it would take to run the ansible script. To run the script, I would have to open the vultr web interface, open up my code directory, and paste the install script into vultr.

The ansible script setup is literally running one script, ~/Documents/delugedaemon/

I want to jump back into the project and set up an aria2c web ui deployment script. One of the shitty things about the ansible script is that it doesn’t set the password to the deluge webui. Instead, the delugewebui’s password is the default. I think there are probably bots out there scanning the web for deluge daemons with default passwords. It’s a bad idea to keep the password default but I’m so lazy that I don’t usually change it when I spin up a seedbox.

I’m tempted to scrap the deluge torrent box and improve my aria2c torrent box. I’ve never been happy with my ansible deployment script anyway. It’s too error prone and it’s not idempotent, meaning it doesn’t meet ansible standards of quality. I can’t even describe idempotent correctly.

From the Ansible glossary

An operation is idempotent if the result of performing it once is exactly the same as the result of performing it repeatedly without any intervening actions.

Yeah, my ansible provisioning script is not this. It’s far from this. There are a shit ton of CURL hacks and shell calls, which are both not idea in Ansible playbooks.

I haven’t run the playbook since I upgraded my operating system. There must be some small difference in this environment to my last one, so shit isn’t working correctly.

I don’t even want to look into it. The ansible playbook was a pile of junk to begin with. It’s got too many hacks to make it worth the maintenance. This is why I want to jump ship and get an aria2c seedbox script.

No ansible, just the minimum number of commands in a bash script to get a server running.

The whole reason I want a seedbox is to download movies and shows that my friends talk about, but I don’t have access to. I don’t have netflix and I’m getting rid of amazon prime in a week, rather than renewing my subscription. I can’t afford either.

I can afford $0.04 which is what it cost to run a seedbox for a few hours. I spin up a seedbox in the Netherlands, download whatever movie/show I want to see, transfer the flick to my local PC, then destroy the seedbox.

Last night I downloaded a movie my friend J. recommended, Kingsmen: The Secret Service. I remember hearing about this movie a few years ago. I can’t remember where or who from… Anyway, it’s on my local SSD now, so I can watch it whenever.

Another series I want to see is Key and Peele. There are so many sketches on YouTube but I’ve seen just about every one. The only way to see more is to acquire the actual show!

I feel the need to justify myself. I’m not going to just speak my mind, because in doing so I am tempted to use all the excuses I’ve read online about people who enjoy file sharing. I was about to simply regurgitate what I’ve heard.

Instead, I’m going to try and come up with an original thought. I think such thing is almost impossible, but here goes.

When I was a kid, there was no TiVo and there was no internet. If I wanted to watch a TV show but wasn’t able to physically be in front of the TV when the show was airing, I could throw in a blank tape into the VCR, tune my TV to the correct channel, hit the record button, then walk away.

I wasn’t a software pirate when I recorded a TV show in this way. Nobody was. In this time in the 90’s, it was normal and commonplace to record TV shows, and even share that tape with friends. Disney got one payment per VHS tape. That VHS tape could be watched hundreds of times by every family member, and Disney still only got the original money from the sale of the one VHS tape.

Today, things are different. Many of my family members have their own Netflix accounts. Netflix gets a subscription per each house…

I’m not making a good point. Maybe YouTube rentals is a better point in this instance, where each view from each person can result in an income for the media company. That’s a different point though, and that’s because times have changed where people spend more time alone on their devices than together as a family where one purchase can result in dozens of views.

That’s a different point and not one I’m trying to make.

The point I’m trying to make is that… I don’t believe in Intellectual Property. And I am not going to see the flick unless I pirate it. I’m not a customer to begin with.

Ah fuck, I reverted to the common software pirate excuses. I couldn’t help it, they’re too easy!

Low hanging fruit. Easy targets.

New subject.

My dad texted me asking info about the IT stuff. I told him I wanted to move out soon so I think he wants to get a handle on the router/modem stuff before I’m gone. I put together a little document which should contain everything he needs. I removed the passwords for obvious reasons.

He’s getting the Centurylink modem replaced because it’s flaking out. I don’t have access to the centurylink account otherwise I would have done so long ago. Apparently he didn’t have access either, but my brother M. tried to access it on his behalf and the CenturyLink team blocked him from doing so. I didn’t try because I knew that’s exactly what would happen. Only the account holder can do that shit and I’m not about to pose as my father.

I just want out.

I’ve been looking at apartments, room rentals, land… Apparently there are actually several places I could stay which fit in my budget! I was really surprised. I thought I was in a class of human which cannot possibly rent a place, but apparently I was mistaken.

There are caveats at my low price point, around $400. Roommates, for example. I have to show this one place which isn’t a living space, but an office space. It’s hella cool though!

I could sell Bitcoin from here! It’s right at a busy intersection which would be a nice spot for such an exchange. In addition, I could run all the servers I wanted. There’s no doubt that the possible internet connection at this location would be out of this world as compared to what I’m used to!

The day before yesterday I wrote that eBay upped my max listings to 10,000. I thought that meant that I could list up to that many for free… I was wrong. All that meant was that I can list that many items. My seller rating is good enough to where I am allowed to do so. However, that doesn’t mean I get those listings free. Anything past my base 1000 listings gets charged $0.10 per listing, as per usual.

That sucks! Oh well, that’s the name of the game. eBay takes and eBay makes.

I did receive a special promotion, however. I get to list 100 items and only pay $0.05 per insertion! That’s good news indeed.

My internet is down again. Luckily I can still type in WordPress and not lose my progress. I’ve never had the problem where WordPress didn’t gracefully handle an outage. Still, I’m paranoid and every now and then I copy-paste my entire document into gedit just to be safe.

The other day I mailed a letter to a customer which contained a USPS Intelligent Mail Barcode that I generated myself. I hoped to see that letter tracking information on USPS Informed Visibility show up, but is has not. My USPS mailing account shows zero activity, zero mailings. I’m starting to think that maybe I have to actually go through with the whole mail permit thingy. It’s $220 for a mail permit! That’s absolutely ludacris. If I have to pay that every year, I’m better off just using, and scrapping my idea for competing with them. I don’t have the mailing volume to justify paying for a mail permit!

I haven’t given up yet, though. I think I may have printed the barcode in the wrong size, or it had some attribute that was out-of-spec to where the readers could not correclty scan the barcode. I could have encoded an error in the barcode as well, such as putting in the wrong mailer number or something. There’s a lot of possibilities.

I adjusted my first class letter mailing template in GIMP, and downloaded a different USPS IMb font. Condensed font. It looks closer to that of the one used by I sent two more letters with my custom generated IMb, so we’ll see if we get any tracking data in Informed Visibility in the upcoming days.

I might just bite the bullet and use lettertrackpro. It’ll cost me $180 for 1000 transactions there. And they have the e-mail tracking notifications already set up. It’s $0.15 per transaction with them. I don’t think I’ll send more than 1000 letters in a year which makes the cost of lettertrackpro worth it if it means I don’t have to buy a mailing permit.

I still don’t know. I don’t know if there’s a requirement for me to get a mailing permit before I can use trackable IMbs. I still have more research to do on the subject before I call it quits.

I’m quite unsure of what to do about the trading cards. I have been thinking of lowering my prices, but I’m not sure that will actually result in more sales. I think that might just lower my chances of turning a profit, because I’ll sell the same amount of cards but get less profit per card.

I’m not sure! These covid-19 times are trying times!

I don’t want to slow down my listing, because I sell more when I list more. I’m just worried that the rate at which I’m selling will not be enough to turn any profit in the next few weeks. At this point I’m worried of having to pay eBay more than I make from eBay.

I suppose I have an excuse to list. $0.05 per insertion due to the promotion I received. I will continue on then, and pursue my dream career!

I’ll wind down this post with some affirmations, and gratitude, as usual.

64. Today, I will be courageous. (ooh, I like this one! fits very well with my situation!)

Before I forget, I wanted to touch on a topic which Joe Rogan brought up. He said that he avoids negative thoughts towards himself. He cuts them out like weeds. I like that, and I want to incorporate it into my own life. Negative thoughts are the reason why I dwell on things I’m ashamed about. Negative thoughts perpetuate a cycle of self doubt and low self esteem. Negative self thoughts prevent confidence. If I am able to weed out negative self thoughts, I can improve my mental health and live a better life!

Ok then, back to the gratitude and affirmations. I’m actually out of affirmations on my 101 positive things to say to myself. I’ve written all of them down except for one which I don’t believe in–

70. I am a child of god.

I don’t believe in that one. That’s a Christian sentiment that I don’t subscribe to. Instead, I subscribe to the fact that the total number of minds in the universe is 1. I am not a child of god, I am god. I’m not saying I’m Jesus or his father. I’m saying that Jesus is god. I’m god. Jesus’s father is god. You are god. My parent’s dog is god. The trees are god. The grass is god. This computer is god.

We are all god. Not a god, but god itself. Consciousness and god are synonyms.

Consciousness (god) got so bored and lonely that consciousness split itself into 7.8 billion+ parts, to experience different things and not be so fucking bored. Not just humans either, but all life and even things not considered alive. It’s all consciousness, or fragments of god.

I could go on for awhile about that, but I don’t think I’d be saying anything I haven’t already said. See my 2020 mushroom trip experience for more information.

I guess I just start the affirmation list over again, now that I covered everything.

  1. I love myself.
  2. The world has a need for me.

A similar diagram to this was shared on the Nerds United Discord server lately. I like it a lot, and it’s something that I can strive for. I am on a path to find my Ikigai! I am uniquely suited to provide something to the world, which in turn satisfies my needs. I just gotta find that sweet spot!

I’m grateful for Nerds United, because they are a welcoming group and enjoy some of the same things as I do. I hope to open up and allow myself to be vulnerable and part of that community just a little more every week.

I’m grateful for lettertrackpro, because it will be a great service to use even if my own letter tracking efforts fail.

I’m grateful for the great outdoors and nature. Nature is not freaking out even though the COVID-19 pandemic is ongoing. Nature, specifically the birds and the deer and the wind and the trees, are going about their business as usual, which in turn calms me and reminds me that everything is okay and that I can continue on in peace and with love and compassion.

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