Mon Nov 23 2020

Therapy Homework

  • Practice positive affirmations 2 times a day
  • CoDA 30q

Notes from therapy

Today I asked the question, “How do you talk about frustrating topics without ranting?”

The response I got was that I did pretty good about it when I talked earlier.

The important things are to

  • Share equal talking time with the person I’m talking to– Stop talking and listen.
  • Don’t be “that guy” that just goes on and on about the topic.
  • Talk to a friend about it.
  • End on a positive note.


Hello and good morning. I woke up today to 4 orders, which I promptly picked and packed. I am feeling rather nervous this morning. I am afraid that I will make a mistake in processing orders. I reasoned through this fear with a reminder that our world is software defined, and that most mistakes can simply be undone.

I received a message with one of the orders– “please combine shipping for these two cards and refund me the extra for the second card if possible.”

Not possible. The amount charged for shipping was accurate. $13 for worldwide shipping to UK.

I responded honestly, saying that I cannot offer combined shipping because $13 is the minimum I can pay for an order to the UK. I am becoming a top rated seller on eBay and a tracking number is a requirement for that.

The customer understood, but I still felt fear that they might be unhappy with their order for some reason.

The thing is that they already paid, and asked for a partial refund… That didn’t make a lot of sense to me, as they had already agreed to the terms and paid!

I am afraid, still.

It’s obvious to me that my body is nervous for some reason. My brain is luckily compensating for all this surplus fear today, but I think my body needs a good workout in order to be free of this extra unhelpful emotion.

There is enough fucking fear in the world right now! I don’t need this extra.

I sold another card this morning. That’s very good news since Tuesday is often a slow day for orders.

It’s still monday… What I mean is that Tuesday is a day when orders often do not get mailed out, because there were no sales on Monday.

It is my goal to get 1+ orders on every day of the week. I want this to be so consistent and so solid, to where getting 0 orders in a day is unheard of.

I think part of achieving that goal will be to get up and running, which will drastically lower the fees that I have to pay.

All in good time.

I’m making small progress on sbtp. I’m still not up to daily progress, but I’m getting close.

I’ve decided to prioritize eBay listing over coding sbtp. Don’t get me wrong, both are things that are a priority that I want to happen every day. eBay listing is the thing that I think I need to do earlier in the day on a more consistent basis in order to get more consistent sales.

I think the way that eBay works is that new listings are queued to get placed into the search results– they don’t appear instantly after being listed. It is that reason that I want do list early. When prime shopping time in the evening rolls around, I want my day’s items to appear right there at the top.

I know that when I shop on eBay, I don’t browse through pages and pages of search results. Time is money! I usually end up purchasing something on the first page. That’s why I’m going for Top Rated Plus and that’s why I list every day.

Here’s a kickass unreleased song from TEMPHUiBIS.

I wanted to link to, but it looks like that site is down. I wonder if the domain is available? I am thinking of purchasing it.

You know what grinds my gears? When websites ask me to verify my e-mail by entering in a code that they are e-mailing to me… but the e-mail they sent is taking FOREVER to show up in my inbox. Don’t make me wait! Reeeee!

I think I might be feeling extra anxious today because my body doesn’t feel good. I’ve got soreness in my upper back from the yoga that I did yesterday.

The nice thing about soreness from yoga is that it can be cured with more yoga! Funny how that works.

I’m feeling teh pain! I wanna get off my computer and go do yoga, but I got 3 minutes of writing left.

Oh hey, I think it’s okay to end work early to go take care of myself!

But now I’m using that as an excuse to go figure out a cellphone verification issue I’m having on one of my cryptocurrency exchange accounts… LOL my brain loves to take shortcuts!

I did that same yoga video just now. FeelsGoodMan.

Time to write once again! I’m super eager to jump into listing on eBay right now. I’m ready to do some work! is available for ~$8/yr. I’m totes thinking of snatching up that domain. I want to find out how many people visit the domain, and I’d also like to try using and neocities to host a simple page which can track pageviews and redirect people to TEMPHUiBIS’s social media pages.

And of course I’ll be putting my Sponsored by Sakura Blossom Trading Post link in there.

But yeah, I want to track page loads somehow, and see exactly how many visitors are coming to the site. I’ll hold the domain for a year, then see if it’s worth holding for a year after that.

I’m thinking that this might be a bad investment…

The thing with websites is that websites seem to be dying out. Nowadays a lot of businesses don’t even bother getting a website. They can do everything they need to do for free through other internet companies.

Why pay for a website when you can have a nice Facebook page? I think that’s how the thought process works for a lot of people. Privacy or control of the web server isn’t something that’s considered. The latter might even be seen as a bad thing, because of the learning required to self-host and maintain.

I don’t think most people want to spend time on that, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Simple and easy is good, especially for something like a website that can be very complex.

Speaking of complexity… I’m going to have a hard time restricting myself to building a simple website for I like to make complex, beautiful things for people, especially when it’s in a domain I enjoy.

Speaking of enjoyable domains.. I’m expecting to receive a big box of scrap vinyl today. Super stoked! The stickers I will make are going to be wonderful!

Ok so I got some homework for these upcoming weeks. CoDA 30q, I’m jumping back into it!

It looks like the last time I mentioned, “30q” in my blog was on October 21. On that day, I completed CoDA 30q #28 which means that #29 is next.

CoDA 30q #29

Discuss the saying, “Let Go, and Let
God.” Is there any person, place, or situation
with which you are upset or obsessing today?
Each time you are uncomfortable and recognize
a lack of peace inside, remember to work Steps
One, Two, and Three. Decide to turn the
situation over to the care of your loving Higher
Power. Say to yourself, “I am powerless over
this person….” Write about the situation. What
are you feeling? What are you needing? What
is their part? What is your part? Prayerfully
surrender the outcome to your Higher Power
and put it all in your “God Box”.

Co-Dependents Anonymous ThirtyQuestions #29

Ok so there isn’t anything right now which I’m obsessing or upset about. I was a little upset about a conversation I had yesterday, but I worked through that with my therapist.

Ok then, I will use that conversation as a thought experiment for this exercise.

The conversation was the one I had with my father, where he didn’t seem interested in my suggestion of stem cell injections. I was afraid that our relationship would become more distant as a result. I was afraid of being disliked.

It’s okay though. I did detective work and I talked to my therapist and I have concluded that I didn’t do anything wrong. I expressed myself and my dad just wasn’t interested in that point and that’s okay.

I am powerless over this person.

Write about the situation.


What are you feeling?

Fear of disconnection.

What are you needing?


What is their part?

My father has no part.

What is your part?

Every part. It is my job to self-affirm.

Prayerfully surrender the outcome to your Higher Power and put it all in your “God Box”.

How do I do that and put it in the God Box?

Ohhh I think I get it. I put the concern in the god box. I give it up, surrender, and give the issue to god, rather than holding onto it as my own responsibility.

“I’m afraid that my dad doesn’t like me.”

A phrase which I wrote on a piece of paper

I’m letting it go. My dad is going to like me or dislike me and I’m not going to worry about it either way. I’m going to be my genuine, authentic self regardless. It’s in the god box now.

Gratty & Affy

12. I love me.

I’m going to do some classic affirmations today as well. Opposite direction!

101. I will learn from yesterday, live for today and hope for tomorrow.
100. I can change my life.

I’m grateful for internet video calls which let me speak to my therapist and people in my groups.

I’m grateful for Taco Bell. No reason other than I’m hungry and I happened to think about yummy vegan tacos and burritos and omgomg omg. But now I can’t have their delish tortillas because I’ve gone gluten free! Omg the tragedy! It’s okay though, I know they have gluten free options. Their burrito bowls are really delicious and that’s something that I could get! Not that I am going to eat at T-Bell anytime soon. I’m still a broke boi and I don’t have a fast food budget.

I’m grateful for budgets! I really like YNAB. I can see me re-subscribing to that in the future, when I have a budget for budget software!

Ok then, have a swell day, me!

Excelsior and propaganda!

What, why propaganda?! Because it came to mind! Hell, we could have some propaganda that is actually good. Propaganda doesn’t have to be bad.

Good propaganda! Who’s propaganda? My propaganda! The propaganda that Chris is pretty great and lovable!

Looking for VOCALOID trading cards?

Check out Sakura Blossom Trading Post