Sat Feb 8 2020

I’m at Dragon’s Parlor Games. I’m waiting for my friends to finish playing their game before we play Mahjong. I’m freaking out. I dunno why. I always freak out when I coming here.

The prompting event is that I’m in a room full of people. The interpretation is that I’m in danger. The urge is to go back to my truck and drive home. The physical vulnerability is that I am hungry. The physical sensation is slouching. I want to hide. I’m frowning. I’m tense. My diaphram is tense. The feeling is _____(?) Fear perhaps?

I’m thirsty. I bought apple juice but I really want water. They don’t have water for sale. All their drinks are sugary. I don’t like sugar. I’m going to check my truck for a water bottle. I probably have one in there. I might have an empty which would be okay. I could fill it up in the restroom. Or I could go across the street to Jimmy John’s or Rocky Mountain Chocolate factory.

I really need water. I left in a hurry so I didn’t grab one or think to grab one. Apparently there is a pun competition coming up. Jason is going to it. Jason is the organizer for Nerds United. I haven’t said hi to anyone except B. and D.

We played Mahjong for 3+ hours. I commented that I want to watch Mahjong anime now. D. suggested Akagi something. P. suggested Saki something. Both are anime which feature Mahjong.

I think it would make Mahjong more appealing if I watched some cool anime which featured it. Heck, the original reason I bought a set was because of Legendary Gambler Tetsuya.

That gives me the thought of cross promotion. Mahjong anime could totally make some extra income if they sold mahjong sets! They could just but a paid programming type ordering screen at the end of every episode! LOL, I bet they already do that. I bet my idea is not unique.

So It’s 9:52 PM and I’m just getting to my computer for the first time today. The schedule drift is real. I woke up at 3PM and exercised, then made curry and rice in a hurry. I gathered my Mahjong set then I rushed over to Dragon’s Parlour Games. I wrote in a pocket notepad while I waited for the group to finish playing a Disney Villain game. It looked fun and everyone who played said it was a good time.

Maybe I’ll go to play board games next weekend. I’ll give it some thought.

I really want to jump on Steam right now and see if B. and S. are playing Squad. I want to play Squad right now! But I just remember my #1 priority every day is to write 2000 words in my journal. I’m going to go ahead and write in my journal until that 2000 words is entered!

I’m giving myself full permission to do a mind flow. Writer’s way type of thing. Just write down whatever comes to mind, and don’t think about editing things out or making a quality article. This is 100% for my purposes of getting my thoughts on paper, getting my thoughts processed, and getting my thoughts out.

I don’t really know if this is a good thing or not. Am I wasting my time? Is it better to write a quality article than an article that is just a brain dump?

I think It’s good. Usually I am more intentional with my thoughts that I put down. Usually I think about what I say before I type it.

Not today, and yes, I think it’s good to do this on occasion. It gets shit out on paper and I already said that so let’s move onto the next topic.

Food. Food is great and food is grand and food is something that I can understand. I brought two tupperware containers to the game store with me. One had curry, one had rice. In the past I would be too afraid to eat in a game store, but not after last time I was there. The other group who were playing magic brought in a bunch of pizzas and fast food. They did the same thing this time. Apparently eating in a game store is a socially acceptable thing.

I just went ahead and ate in the food store and I didn’t even feel bad about it. It’s not like it’s a conflict of interest for me to be eating in there. They don’t sell vegan meals, or meals at all. They have sugary drinks and junkfood.

So yeah, not a problem to eat in there. I just did my best to not make a mess, and it’s all good. I made an impulse purchase. I think I will enter that in YNAB right now. I bought card sleeves in addition to the apple juice. I think it’s important to support the game store I spend time at. Just look at what happened to Dragon’s Fury Games! That place kicked ass. They had so much Hatsune Miku merchandice and games but they went out of business. Very sad. But that’s a harsh reality. It’s hard to make money at game stores.

I asked the employee about donating MTG cards. He said they totally accept donations and/or selling. I am thinking of doing that sometime if I don’t want to spend money at the place, but I want to support them. He knows card values as well, so even if I don’t know, he can let me know.

I’m pretty sure what I have is not worth much. The whole point is to support the store so I’m just planning on donating them.

Yeppers. I want to eat some more now. I have leftover curry and rice, and I think I will devour it soon.

I just entered a $20.01 gas purchase in YNAB. I have a personal rule where I have to fill up when I get below a quarter tank. I adopted that rule from some guy I heard talking to his son about filling up on gas. “Never below a quarter tank.”

I ignored my rule a few months ago and I ended up running out of gas. I had a scary experience when I was rolling down a hill and my engine shut off.

I think my gas tank is designed to run out of gas when going down a hill, rather than running out of gas when going up a hill. I suppose it’s safer to run out of gas when descending, because that means you could see what’s coming and you could turn or downshift or pump the brakes.

I am having bad mental images of the time M. and I drove around Wenatchee to test radio signal propagation. We were driving my personal Suburban at the time. I wasn’t happy about having to drive my Suburban for work. In hindsight I should have insisted on being provided with a rental vehicle as we had done in the past.

Anyway, My Suburban’s brakes are not very responsive. It takes 3/4 of the pedal’s length before it actually engages and starts braking. If you’re thinking, “Chris, take it in to the brake shop.” I did. They smoothed out my rotors or disks or whatever, but didn’t fix the issue with the pedal. And they charged me way too much money.

Anyway, we were low on gas one time in a remote mountainous area and we considered driving back into town to get more gas. We risked it and kept going, driving up and down steep roads. M. was behind the wheel and I had the thought of running out of gas and bombing down a steep gravel hill and either flying off a cliff, or driving into the side of the mountain to slow us down.

Either one was a terrible outcome to a terrible predicament. My Suburban is not and was not well suited for the driving terrain we were coming across.

That experience as a whole during that job was bad. I was so stressed out because we were sedentary and driving for 8+ hours a day. I didn’t have any sort of exercise routine at the time. I suppose that’s incorrect and I’m completely forgetting about all the rollerblading we were doing!

Wenatchee has a wonderful bike path through the hipster part of the city. It’s a big loop which crosses the river twice. Idk the name of that river. Wenatchee river? Columbia river? Spokane river? I really don’t know. Anyway, there are a bunch of riverfront parks, volleyball courts, playgrounds, parking lots, etc. We found some really exciting spots which were great for rollerblading.

So the job was bad, but the after hours activities were pretty good. The rental house we stayed at had really great internet as well. I had my laptop so I was able to play Squad in the evenings.

The work though… I wonder if it would have been better if we had a rental pickup truck. We stalled going up a hill once. i was behind the wheel and I was really freaking out. It was my fault. I just didn’t give it enough gas and we ended up rolling backwards. We had just started the hill climb so it wasn’t a big deal. The engine just died and we rolled back 10 feet to where the hill bottomed out. The engine wouldn’t start again and we were in someone else’s farm property so I was hella freaking out.

I was really stressed when we had to drive in any terrain that was remote, or on farmland. In hindsight, I would have said no to a lot of roads we were presented with.

The worst part of the job was probably the time we drove into someone’s farmland that had a bunch of no trespassing signs. We drove through a series of gates which were open, but had these signs. I had a bad feeling but M. behind the wheel felt fine with it.

We came around a corner and there was a parked vehicle on the side of what looked like a dead end. I urged M. to turn around, but the path was so narrow that he struggled to do so in a timely manner. A person who I assume was the property owner came out of a grove of trees looking at us and making gestures with her arms as if to say, “what the fuck!”

She walked over to us as M. turned around. He became increasingly agitated and sped up as he struggled to turn around on this narrow road. The property owner ran towards us and I told him to stop and told him I’m going to talk to her.

I rolled down the window and said hi or something. The woman was frustrated, and it looked like she had just put on her clothes as fast as she could. Her bra strap wasn’t even on properly.

I think I said, “hi, we’re working for the county doing radio coverage testing.”

The woman didn’t believe me and she said, “did you see the signs?”

I did my best poker face and didn’t respond.

I explained again, pointed to our 2 laptops, and antennas on the roof. She finally started to believe what I was saying.

She looked like she was about to cry. At first she seemed very angry as she ran towards us. I assume she was tanning or having sex or something and we intruded in her space. I can understand her anger and frustration.

She made me promise to respect the signs and never come there again. I said we would mark this road as off limits on the map and we would never be back.

M. and I drove off and we were both silent for what seemed like a half hour. I was just so ashamed. I had seen the signs, ignored them.

One other guy actually locked us behind a fence. He did it on purpose after he saw us roll through the open fence. That guy was just a dick and I don’t feel bad about that one, especially knowing that the road we were on wasn’t his. He brought up how he was fighting the county for that road, but both M. and I knew he would never get it because there is a government run water treatment facility or something back there. That guy was just a dick who thought we were drunk tourists.

“I assume you’re lost.”

No, fuck face! I wanted to say.

“No, I know where I am. We’re working for the county doing radio coverage testing.”

I pointed to the equipment.

His demeanor changed and he might have apologized. Actually, I think I apologized, even though such an apology was unwarranted. He should have been the one apologizing. It was fucked up and he’s an asshole and whatever.

I didn’t like that job at all. I won’t be doing it again.

I’m grateful for mini composition books which are just pocket sized notebooks which I can use to write on when I’m out and about. Writing really helps me keep calm.

I’m grateful for my friends who are excited to see me and spend time with me. They are proof that I am deserving of love and belonging.

I’m grateful for my instant pot which can quickly cook rice and curry and whatever else I throw in it. This easy to use device gives me excitement for making meals which keep me going and give me inspiration for recipes to make in the future.

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