Tag: therapy

  • Fri May 1 2020

    Fri May 1 2020

    Paying rent yesterday was painful. I have so little money to spend on myself, and I spend a huge chunk of my income on rent. I loot at my upcoming expenses and I realize that I can’t spend money on myself at all. I have food stamps for food, and no money whatsoever for anything […]

  • Sat Apr 4 2020

    Sat Apr 4 2020

    Strange and disturbing dreams today. I was back in school and there was an annoying skinny kid in the class. I was busy working on a new revision of a MIDI interface prototype that I was making for a client. I was trying to figure out how to use the CAD software to extrude a […]

  • Fri Apr 3 2020

    Fri Apr 3 2020

    I forgive myself. I just want to start with that. Had a call with my therapist K. this morning. I started out the call in bad place, and I ended the call in a bad place. I woke up at 9AM and I took the garbage to the street, and some packages to the mailbox. […]

  • Wed Mar 18 2020

    Wed Mar 18 2020

    Group therapy is cancelled. Individual therapy is changed to phone-only, as FBH is closing their doors to the public. Wild shit. Is COVID-19 really this bad? There have been 18 corona viruses before it, but somehow #19 is this huge threat? I don’t understand. I wonder if this is an overreaction? Well, this is life […]

  • Sun Mar 15 2020

    Sun Mar 15 2020

    Good morning! Last night I got hella high. The computer high, as in the shit I do when I let my computer addiction run wild. I don’t even feel bad about it, which is a really nice for a change. So I was angry yesterday early. I was angry that I didn’t wake up early […]

  • Fri Mar 6 2020

    Fri Mar 6 2020

    Ok the past few days have been sub 2000 words and it’s no big deal. I deserve a break and I deserve self-care and I deserve to be well and happy. Actually I don’t want to be happy all the time. It’s something I’ve thought about quite a bit. If I were happy all the […]

  • Fri Feb 28 2020

    Fri Feb 28 2020

    3:12AM. Just woke up. Yesterday was rather productive. I sold 3 P-Memories cards to a buyer for $11 plus $1.10 shipping. I packaged up those cards and a VHS rewinder that I sold. I built an app prototype that I had thought of years ago. I read a chapter in I thought it was Just […]

  • Tue Feb 25 2020

    Tue Feb 25 2020

    I couldn’t sleep. Fuck me. I’ve got something on my mind that is bothering me, and I’m distracting myself rather than dealing with it. I don’t know what it is. Perhaps it is the money situation. It’s probably the money situation. I wanna sleep, but I don’t think I’ll be able to wake up in […]

  • Thu Feb 20 2020

    Thu Feb 20 2020

    I want to write a new novel. How cool would it be to be an author? Wait a minute, I’m already an author. Let me rephrase. How cool would it to be a prolific author? Like, a novel a year for the rest of my life? That would be something. Then if or when a […]

  • Wed Feb 19 2020

    Wed Feb 19 2020

    My therapist took me on as my CoDA “pseudo sponsor” until the time when I find a sponsor of my own. Last Friday she gave me a list of questions which I am supposed to ponder on and answer at our next meeting, this Friday at 9:30AM. The questions are as follows. What is the […]