Thu Dec 3 2020

Today is Thursday which means it’s group therapy time! I wonder if anybody other than me is going to show up today? There was no group last week because of Thanksgiving. The week before that, I was the only client who showed up.

I didn’t do my homework. I don’t remember what the homework was. That’s okay, as long as I’m showing up, that’s a big effort towards accomplishing my goals.

I doubt nobody else will show up. Other clients have been coming less and less, and I think this far ahead into the group, it’s likely that new people will show up.

I’m feeling nervous. I don’t want to be the only client! It’s okay if I am, but it’s a little funny.

Honestly I think the group facilitators are making a mistake by not sending out reminder e-mails every week. I think the main reason why I’m the only one who showed up two weeks in a row is because I’m very organized and I kept a hold of an e-mail from October which has the Zoom invite meeting number and ID.

I have group therapy on my calendar, and I refer to the old e-mail. The e-mail with the zoom invite link is actually one I had to call in and get, because the original invite link I had was invalid. So realistically I think all the students who originally signed up for class just don’t have a valid zoom link.

Notes From Group

That was the last group! And yes, I was the only student to show up. LOL!

Ask my therapist about the Holiday Group which is taking place on the 18th.

What’s the name for a dog breed that is a Shitsu + Wiener dog?


  • Social Support
  • Touch
    • babies die without touch

How can I become more stronk? What tools do I need?


Rejection Sensitivity

Work on vocalizing the internal thoughts when with a group

Act Naturally Class

Coffee Connection Zoom group

The lead facilitator was talking while eating LOL

1 What characteristics or qualities do I have that help me be a “good” source of support for myself and others?

I take time for myself. I made a DPC and fill it in every day

Forgiveness Group

Holiday Group Dec 18th painting


Ok so group was good. After that, I went for a walk, showered, shaved, then listed cards on eBay. I had a hearty late lunch and drank Earl Grey tea. I watched Ironmouse play a prisonbreak game with Nyanners. I zoned out. I cut out probably 150 card dividers.

Yesterday I wrote numbers 1-100 on dividers, to organize my Sasami-San @ Ganbaranai (SAG) cards TO THE MAX! It wiped out my supply of dividers though, so it was good to make some more today. Damn, writing titles on tabs for 100 dividers takes a long time! It’s going to be really nice when I pull SAG orders though… I can go straight to the card number because of the tabs. Now if only all my boxes had labels 1-100!

Eventually I’ll get there. I think a document printer would be necessary to have efficiency in that task, though. I’m so stoked to get a printer. I don’t know when that will be.. When the next stimulus check drops? If that ever happens? I’ve just been acting as if it isn’t coming.

I can’t rely on Uncle Sam, that’s a bad idea. If I did that, I’d get lazy and I’d just want another check in a few months… LOL that’s kinda what I did after the first check… Kinda. I’ve been working hard, so there’s that.

Nah, I gotta give myself more credit. I have been working really hard. I was working hard even when the first stimulus check dropped. The money I got from that check just amplified how hard I was working!

So yeah, today was the last group. I’m bummed about it.

Luckily, I got some hints on other groups I can be a part of. Apparently there are two Zoom chat groups that meet in the morning and at lunchtime. They’re open to everybody but apparently the lead people do behavioral health clinical work.

I’m thinking of going to that. There is no objective other than to be social and hang out or something like that. I’m thinking of checking those out. They meet 7 days a week. I think I will put it off indefinitely unless I pick a day to do it…

How about… Fri–

I can’t do tomorrow because SpaceX might be launching Starship SN8 for a major milestone test launch.. I’ve been waiting for that launch all year; it gets priority!

Ok then… What’s a day that I don’t have much social stuff going on? Thursday! Oh shit, that’s right. Resiliency group is over, which means that’ll leave a hole in my social schedule unless I do something about it.

Ok then, Thursday it is!

Oh shit, maybe I could do Tuesday and Wednesday as well. I didn’t play any video games this week, and that absense left a hole in the “Socialize 1h” item on my DPC.

Hmm… I’ll think about that.

I’m thinking of not playing video games tonight.. It’s probably a bad idea since I’ve been working A LOT today and I could use the social interaction with friends. I already checked off my 1h socialize box today because I did group therapy…


I didn’t code or do the wiki today. I’m slipping on that front! I’m afraid to code because there is so much I don’t know, and I’m afraid that I wont be able to finish the project.

Detective work says, BULLSHIT!

The only way I won’t finish the project is if I have days like this where I don’t try. Every day I do try, I make progress towards the project completion.


Ok writing session over. Time to meditate, then I’ll do one more sesh.

Or will I? It’s already 8:44PM.. It’s getting late. Right now is video game time! Fuuuuuck, I fucked myself today by not having focus on my pomodoro…

Well regardless, meditation time is now.

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