Tue Jun 16 2020

I listed my suburban on Craigslist. That’s $5 to list that I won’t be getting back.

I’m so scared. I’m scared of people calling me and coming to my house to look at the suburban. I’m scared that they will try to scam me. I’m scared that they will drop the price down so low and I’ll buckle under the pressure and say yes to their outrageous offers.

That’s not going to happen though. I’m checking the facts and I know myself better than that. I’m not going to get scammed right in front of my face. I’m going to say no and the deal is off if they don’t pay a fair price.

Kelly’s blue book says the Suburban is worth $300-$600 depending on condition. I have a FIRM requirement of at least $500. I put $1500 in the CL post because I know people love to barter on CL. I’m giving myself so much wiggle room that asking anything less than $500 would be an obvious lowball offer.

I am sick with worry.

I arranged for an interested party to come look at my suburban, but they didn’t give me a time. I went to clean out my suburban, and I discovered that it doesn’t start.

I grabbed my genius boost which is only at 25% charge, and it wasn’t enough to start the suburban.

I discovered that mice had made a nest under the back seats.

I feel alone in life. I just want to get rid of this suburban. Give me $100 and take it away. I

See this is a problem. I am feeling so depressed right before I’m going to make an in-person sale. I’m going to get taken advantage of at this point.

I remember why I removed my listing last time. I removed it because selling a vehicle on Craigslist means I’m going to have an entire day of worry.

I don’t like that. I am too alone in this world to worry for an entire day. I have nobody to talk it over with. I must shoulder the entire load of grief myself.

3:30PM. I deleted the listing from CL again. I literally cannot function with the shame that I’m experiencing right now.

I can’t move forward. I can’t work. I can’t watch Better Call Saul. I can’t take a nap. I’m literally physically sick to my stomach and fighting back the urge to vomit.

I need a 4/4 Breastplate with protection from humans.

I’m going to take my suburban down to Spaldings tomorrow. I want it gone and I will take bottom dollar for it. I can’t be sitting here anxiously awaiting a buyer. I can’t clean it out because I can’t use my dad’s vaccum or extension cord. I have my own shop vac but I can’t use it because I’ll get mice poop all in the vacuum and just fuck that.

I’m donating it or taking it to Spalding. I don’t want money. I want peace of mind.

Did I mention that a buyer showed up and was disgusted about the mice poop? He said I wouldn’t have any problem selling it but he’s turned off by the mice poop. I said my bottom dollar was $800. I should have said $500 or $600.

Every opportunity I have to sell this thing I shit all over. I can’t handle myself it there are other people involved. Full stop.

I can’t handle getting a job because I lose my marbles when I’m asked the simplest of questions. I’m looked in the eyes and I panic.

I’m not suited for this world.

Looking for VOCALOID trading cards?

Check out Sakura Blossom Trading Post