Tue Jun 30

color, abstract, artifact

I fucked up my eBay product downsizing so bad. I accidentally ended ALL but 8 listings. I went from exactly 3000 listings to exactly 8 listings in a matter of minutes.

I stressed out about this so hard last night. Couldn’t sleep.

But then I talked aloud to myself and worked it out.

It was going to be a pain in the ass regardless. There was going to be big problems regardless.

I made the right choice. I signed up with 3D Sellers and got a year with them for $130. If I had done nothing, I’d be paying $300+ extra a month. That’s not sustainable at my business income.

If I could afford eBay anchor subscription level, that would be the best choice. But I can’t. I can’t afford anchor and keep growing. Not yet.

I’ve adoped a new mission for the month of July.

Consistent & Relentless New Products

That’s my motto for July. I’m going to use the new powers I have with 3D sellers to re-create my business from the ground up. I’m going to work my ass off just like I did in June. I’m going to consistently and relentlessly go through my inventory and create bulk lots of cards that my customers will enjoy. I’m going to create 30+ new products a day for the entire month, which will result in 930 new products, and get me back to right around 1000 listings.

I’m going to make this work, because I am wiser now. I am not going to make the same mistake twice now.

I’m going to reorganize my entire inventory. I’m going to toss out the crap that earns me nothing when it goes out the door. I’m going to drive sales even better than I did during June.

My new plan is to cycle out old, non-performing inventory. I’m going to have a store full of highly desirable products, rather than the sheer numbers that I had in June.

I’ve got a lot to figure out. I’m going to have to figure out a way to keep track of an expiring physical inventory. Maybe it means sorting by date or a number. Maybe it means regular cullings where I move the automatically discontinued cards to an archive.

I’m going to completely clear my physical inventory shelfs and start over. I’m going to have to do a lot of inventory counts going forward. It’s likely to take all month to get physical and virtual inventory back in sync.

I’m going to get to it! 2 orders came in overnight, which I’m very grateful for. Here’s to ONE MILLION orders, coming right up!

7:22PM. I had the busiest of days!

I spent a majority of the day going through inventory. I threw hopeless unsold junk out, and I relisted items that I thought had a chance of selling at rock bottom prices.

I completely cleared off my inventory shelf, wiped it down with basil spray, and started over. Every inventory box was given clearly visible labels. I cut off any protruding storage box flaps.

I had a listing frenzy, rapidly posting old inventory at the lowest possible amount I would be content with, and neatly sorting them into inventory storage boxes.

I must have thrown away 7 bags of junk. Old clothes that were labelled, “to be turned into a quilt” were tossed. My ghillie suit, an old UPS backup battery, my green screen.. It’s all boxed or bagged up and ready to go to the dump or recyclers.

This was a great day, and I earned myself 8 sales so far. One of which was a hefty card order, consisting of 27 cards totalling around $60. The customer is in the UK, and asked for a combined shipping invoice. I started sweating because I realized that some of the cards they had ordered had already made it into some card LOTs that I had listed just a few hours prior.

Luckily, only one of the 27 was out of stock. That card had gone out yesterday to another customer. Fuck!

That’s always been a big fear of mine– selling an item twice, and only one customer gets the item they were expecting.

I felt pretty bad but I was determined to make a good sale out of this.

Along with the invoice, I apologized and offered free shipping. That’s going to be about a $13 hit, but I think that’s okay since it’s a $65 order. I don’t want the customer to remember their first transaction with Sakura Blossom Trading Post as a bad one– I want them to remember a fantastic transaction, and I want their business for the life of their card collecting hobby!

They paid and the cards will be sent out in the morning.

Fuck yeah, today was amazing.

I started the day with a walk to the mailbox and a long walk in the backyard. I journalled briefly, then got started on the huge task of getting my store back up and running.

I organized, I sorted, I bagged and labeled. I respected my pomodoro timer. I took short breaks to meditate or stretch. I took long breaks to ride my bike around the block, eat, and run in the backyard.

And now I’m beat. I’m downloading Squad Beta 20. I’m going to see if I can last long enough to get this thing downloaded and play a couple rounds. The download is going to take around 2 hours. At this point, I’m thinking that I’m going to collapse before then.

I want more days like this. More busy days with low stress levels, lots of exercise, lots of sales, and very fulfilling. Not every day can be like this though! I’d get burned out very quickly if every day was like this!

I’m definitely getting stronger. I don’t think I napped today. I haven’t felt the need. Maybe it’s the stress of knowing that I have to act quickly to get my store back to the point where it’s an earning machine. That drive could have been what fueled me today.

Also girl scout cookies.

Praise the heavens, my dad brought me thin mints!

I ate the entire box in two days. I ate a stack of thin mints last night, and another stack this morning. That’s right, Thin Mints for breakfast!

If I see a girl scout cookie vendor at the grocery store tomorrow, I’m going to have to buy another box of thin mints. I felt so energized today… what if it’s all that sugar?

I rarely have the energy that I had today. Today was such an incredible mix of emotion and drive.

Actually, I think I might have napped today. Or was that yesterday? Nah, I think that was yesterday. I’ve been having these really short but restful power naps. It feels like I’m only asleep for thirty seconds, but I definitely slip out of consciousness and I can’t remember what happened the past few minutes (or seconds?) and I count it as a nap.

Works for me! I get the desired effect– a quick recharge!

847.7 MB / 3.5 GB. 7:42 PM.

I’m so stoked for Starlink. There was a scheduled Starlink launch a few days ago. It got scrubbed 4 times so far. Let’s go, Starlink!

But no really, SpaceX is incredible. Their plan is to launch 60 new Starlink satellites every 2 weeks.


Today there was a SpaceX launch for a GPS satellite. I think GPS is a bullshit cover. They played these traditionally produced marketing videos about some military mumbo jumbo. Basically propaganda. Anything with NASA is similar, all scripted and fake. Some of it is actually informative and helpful, other parts are just nationalistic bullshit. Pretty much anytime Jim Bridenstine opens his mouth, I’m basically hitting M on my keyboard.

Anyway, this wasn’t a NASA mission today. This was Airforce. They were dedicating the launch to a general who died recently. I didn’t watch live so I just hit L on my keyboard when there was any footage not coming straight from SpaceX.

The first stage landed successfully on the droneship. There was more military propaganda during the time when the second stage was getting into position to deploy, but I quit caring after that. Another successful booster landing, that’s good enough for me! I can watch the highlight reel when Scott Manley or SpaceXcentric releases a video on the subject.

I read the bulletpoints on Wikipedia which summarized fascism’s core tenants. It sounds a lot like 2020 America.

I think this might be why ANTIFA is considered a terrorist group by the federal government now.

Actually there’s probably more to it than that. I’m out of the loop.

I did hear that the leaders of Black Lives Matter (the organization) has ties to Marxism. As in, they are using the #BLM platform as a method to implement Marxism.

I don’t even know what marxism is. Isn’t it something similar to communism?

Fuck, I’m talkin’ out of my ass now. It’s late LOL.

It’s not that late. I can still see the sun through my blinds. I’m just worn out.

Worn out in a good way. I want to be playing Squad five minutes ago!

I guess there’s a silver lining to having to wait for Squad to download. I wouldn’t have made any effort to get to my daily 2000 words if it hadn’t been for this long download.

I want Starlink five minutes ago!

Apparently a hand picked group of techie people are already getting to test out Starlink. Apparently the ping is super low. I can’t remember the numbers, but I compared them to ping in Squad and whatever the number was, it was two or three times lower than what is normal for me.

Starlink is going to give me a competitive edge in Squad!

I’m so incredibly stoked!

I wonder how much I’m going to have to pay. I’m not even considering a world where I don’t purchase Starlink. I’m purchasing Starlink, that is an absolute.

Poor internet has been a problem for me my entire life. Now, my favorite company in the world is making internet. When that bandwagon arrives, I’m diving head first into it!

That was a nice analogy. A little dated, but I liked how I spiced it up by diving into it.

Oh here’s another saying that I heard recently. “Feed two birds with one scone.”

See I had already researched a nonviolent alternative to, “kill two birds with one stone” and I found some nice alternatives like, “feed two birds with one seed.”

The scone one rhymes, and it makes a little more sense than a seed.


I should put that in the header of my blog or something.

as if


I only virtue signal on special occasions. Like when people ask me why I’m vegan. I dunno how to reply to that without being a snob or the other person feeling like they’re offending me.

I suppose if they’re offended, that’s just their codependency in action. I don’t feel like I’m superior. I only feel like I’m doing what I always do.

It’s not like I start thinking of animal rights at every vegan meal I have. It literally doesn’t cross my mind anymore. I just think of how the food tastes.

Squad is halfway downloaded. 1.7 GB / 3.5 GB.

I’m going to take this opportunity to do some therapy work. I was given the assignment to think about what kind of higher power I would like to have. It’s a higher power of my own choosing, so what would I choose?

Basically Duncan Trussell described exactly what I had thought of when I tripped on mushrooms. Apparently my thought was not unique. I didn’t think it was unique to begin with, but I don’t think I ever heard the same spin that I came to realize when I came back from my 2020 trip.

It goes like this. In a simulation where time is infinite, you are all alone, you can create whatever you want and do whatever you want to do for thousands and thousands of years… At what point do you wonder what it would be like to be one of the lifeforms you created?

What would it be like to simulate a reality where you are not an omnipotent being that can create and do whatever they want. What would it be like to be a carbon based meat bag that lives and dies and really has no solid grasp on what exists outside of their reality tunnel?

That’s the god I saw when I tripped on mushrooms. A bored god who separates itself into infinite consciousnesses and experiences each simultaneously– all for the sake of passing the time.

It’s an ambivalent god. It simultaneously gives no shits, while giving all the shits. It’s forever in a quantum superposition between decisive and apathetic. It’s forever equal in magnificence and meh. It’s the ultimate concentrate of the chaos and serenity of nature.

OG thought.

Just kidding.

It’s my rehashed and regurgitated knowledge, sifted from others more educated and interesting than I.

Now this is starting to feel deep. Ahh, deep, icky! Quick, switch to hentai talk or something low-brow!


censored penis.

censored vagina.

(Like in hentai with the pixellation.)

I wonder what these skin-tone words are doing for my third party ad placements?

penis enlargement, sir?

9 out of 10 women say, “size matters!”

Order today!

No more ads? Ad providers shut their doors to me?

Oh. okay.

I guess I can get the R18 ads now. Maybe I can finally make some money on ad revenue!


Ok no really. Back to the task of inventing a god of my own choosing.

I’m supposed to fill in two columns. Does wordpress to tables?

What I was taught god isWhat I want god to be
Judgementalnon judgmental, non demanding
The GOD Table

I dunno how a thing can be ambivalent, and any one thing else. Ambivalence and loving? That seems like something not possible. It’s like I’m having my cake and eating it too. It’s like I’m returning an item and keeping it at the same time.

I guess both those things are possible in 2020. Maybe I can forge a reality where I can have an ambivalent and loving god.

The god could be loving having the experiences I’m having, at the same time, not give a shit about what happens to me and not do anything about it.

As strange as it might sound, that’s the god I want. Don’t interfere with my business! Just let me play this game of life and let it play out how it plays out.

Some words of gratitude before I finish writing for the day.

I’m grateful for my 6.8 Mbps 4G internet. I’m actually very grateful for this internet, and it’s some of the fastest internet I’ve ever had access to. I can play Squad. I can stream 480p videos. I can download larger files if I’m patient. I’d rather have this than use my parent’s home internet, which is even slower.

I’ve been really happy for this internet and I hope to use it a lot more.

I’m grateful for note paper. I used a ton of it today to sort cards.

I’m grateful for new beginnings! My ebay store is evolving and I’m very pleased with my progress.


Looking for VOCALOID trading cards?

Check out Sakura Blossom Trading Post