Wed Mar 18 2020

Group therapy is cancelled. Individual therapy is changed to phone-only, as FBH is closing their doors to the public.

Wild shit.

Is COVID-19 really this bad? There have been 18 corona viruses before it, but somehow #19 is this huge threat? I don’t understand. I wonder if this is an overreaction?

Well, this is life now. Boring. LOL!

Watching Tim Dodd’s SpaceX Starlink coverage. I could skip ahead to the launch but I’m just chillin’ and listening to what Tim has to say. It’s nice company since I don’t have anyone to chill with in person.

I need Starlink ASAP. I’m happy that SpaceX is launching so many satellites so quickly. I’m really stoked for the service and I hope it’s available to me in the near future. I’m so sick of shitty internet.

As I say that, my internet just went down. Again. Nobody takes responsibility for the home internet. It could be my responsibility, if I had a good line of communication with my parents and access to the account. I have neither.

What we need is a new modem. It has been a flaky, failing modem for months, and we’ve only been getting by because we have a dual WAN router, and the other internet connection has held us over. Lately, that other internet connection has been completely down for weeks, and now we’re left with a flaky modem which goes down several times a day.

I wish I could rely on my own internet. I wish my merits counted. I wish my work resulted in an income.

I don’t know if that other internet connection is supposed to be down or not. Did they cut us off, or did my dad cancel? I have no fucking idea, because my dad and I don’t talk much.

Right now I’m at the mercy of this failed modem and I am completely out when it goes down. When it’s up, I forget about the problem which is going to persist the modem is replaced. I turn a blind eye to the problem which isn’t going to go away until someone does something about it.

I suppose it should be me. I should at least make my dad aware of the issue.

Without internet, I feel like going back to sleep. My day is meaningless.

I guess what I’ll do is I’ll make a script which tells me when the internet is up. That’ll give me some meaning.

The internet came back. I upgraded the router’s firmware and now I can’t log in via Firefox because Cisco sucks. Some console error pops up when I try, “sha256 is undefined”

It works in chrome though. Really sad shit from Cisco.

I’m taking a cheat day today. No exercising.

I’m depressed and sad and lonely.

I thought my EBT card was going to get topped up yesterday, so I went and bought groceries. Nope. No money on the EBT and I had to pay out of pocket. I dunno if I can make rent now. Just checked. $606.77 in checking account. So I have enough for rent. That’s nice.

My paypal is empty though. I bought too many cards via buyee. Fuck!

I’m going to let my auto insurance lapse.

I kept telling myself that something has to give. I’m not making nearly enough money to support all the things I have. Something has to give, and I’m letting that something be my auto insurance. I’ll figure out a way to get around without needing my suburban.

It’s a figurative storm right now, with the COVID-19 lockdowns and quarantines going on. I think all I gotta do is hunker down and slow my purchases, slow my everything. I can spend all the time in the world listing and shipping, and that’s going to be what my future looks like for the next 2 weeks or so. I’m not going to get out of debt any time soon. I don’t have the income for that. I’m going to keep my eyes and ears open for opportunities which come my way which fit into my master plan of being a free market arbitrage/web development entrepreneur.

I got a cash flow issue, with the buyee situation. I didn’t set a budget for this, and I got fucked.

Yikes. Ok then, I’ll take this as lessons to be learned, and move forward!

Starlink 5 deployed successfully! Unfortunately, the first stage was not able to land. Someone in chat said they lost money. LOL that’s pretty funny, they must have bet on it.

Tim is trying to figure out why the first stage failed to land. The theory seems to be that there was an engine failure or burnout.

Interesting stuff. I’ll have to keep my eye out on social media to find out what went wrong. Anyway, the mission was a success, and that’s the most important thing! 60 more satellites deployed which will make up the constellation that I’ll hopefully be using later this year to get off my parent’s fucking terrible internet!

I’m cooking some curry. Last night I was late night snacking, but eventually stopped myself and went to sleep. I’m feeling hungry right now as my curry finishes up it’s final 2 minutes of cooking. I’ll throw some rice on right now so I don’t have to wait quite as long until I can eat.

Ate and exercised.

I had a thought as I took a shower. I doubt it’s an original thought, but here it is.

I think IPFS should be introduced as a browser plugin. With it, users would be enabled to treat the entire internet as a Pinterest. Like a video? Pin it on IPFS. Like an image? Pin it on IPFS.

Enough people doing this, and suddenly there’s a new server-client network paradigm, in that servers don’t need to be centralized anymore. Servers are instead just another person’s PC. I think this new infrastructure would require a paradigm shift. In this new infrastructure, intellectual property needs to get the fuck out of the way.

Only the good shit gets pinned. If your content isn’t getting pinned, it’s because your content sucks. Therefore, the idea of people copying your “intellectual property” is stupid. It’s a fallacy to even think of what is occuring that way. Instead of wanting a tight grip on your “intellectual property”, you would want a loose grip. and a new monetization scheme.

The tight grip, DRM, etc. is the old style. Pre-internet style. The internet is a way for people to instantly share data across the whole planet, and with this new system comes a new way of doing things.

Sharing. Embrace it. Shared art lasts longer and is appreciated more.

I’m getting triggered about IP so I’m switching subjects. I got my cards from Yahoo Auctions JP! (via buyee)

I’m hesitant to open them because I’m out of card sleeves. I have another 1000 penny sleeves on order and they should be here next week. I’m thinking I’m going to open them anyway, and carefully sort and place them into storage boxes. Maybe. Maybe I’ll wait.

I probably shouldn’t wait, given the monetary situation I’m in. I would like to make rent next month!

I’d like to get out of debt as well.

I’d like to get a smart car as well.

I’m thinking of selling my Weiss Schwarz Hatsune Miku card collection. I just keep thinking about Buddhism and how it attributes a bulk of human suffering to the desire to acquire things. I think I am starting to understand that sentiment. It’s the relationships I have with people which truly make me happy. Things don’t make me happy.

I could lose everything in a fire and I’d be left with a lot of grief. If I didn’t have things to begin with, and there was a fire, there would be no suffering.

I’m thinking I’m going to list the cards I have in my collection, at a higher than market price. That way, they might sell, but only at a value which I am willing to receive. After my laptop, that collection is the most precious thing I own, and I am only okay letting it go if it propels me into a future where I’m meeting my goals.

My goals of being a successful entrepreneur! That is what I desire, very much indeed. I hope to afford to rent an apartment with a KICKASS internet connection, or alternatively, be able to afford a tiny home on wheels, and an unlimited 3G connection.

Something. Something better than the internet and the apartment I have now. SpaceX would suffice. I just want to move forward and live the life I want to live, free from soul sucking jobs and unfulfilling work.

I can do it! I am the man! I am in charge of my own destiny and I believe in myself because I know I have the skills and the potential do to great things and serve my people in a fun and exciting way!

An apartment in town would be a good improvement. I could get food deliveries and get rid of my car, I could get high speed internet and pay a house cleaner. I could go bike riding on the Appleway trail while they cleaned, or I could go to my game club or visit the Library and use their 3d Printer. I could get a roommate and spend more time with friends and never be lonely again!

Pipe dream.

…But only if I refuse to believe!

I have already seen a new light in my life, since I started paying rent to my parents and I started living more courageously. I have the power to make my own choices! I choose to be Buddhist, and no longer associate with the Mormon church. This choice is mine, and it feels incredible to be the master of my own body, the master of my own soul, the master of my own life!

I feel like I cover the same topics over and over in my journal.

I guess I should not be dismayed by that. I repeat a lot of the same shit over and over, so it makes sense that my thought process is often similar as that on a previous day.

I think my internet just went out again. My p-data.js ripper script continues, however! I think it’s a bug. I think the network requests are failing but the failures are being caught and ignored. I’ll have to figure out a better error handling routine.

The picture in picture video feature in Firefox is trippy. I can be watching a video that’s playing in a different tab, while writing in my blog. Year 2020, folks! Very interesting indeed.

I found a search engine for IPFS content. It’s pretty sick.

I’m going through there looking for whatever videos I can find. I found by searching for the term, “youtube.”

I have no idea what it is. youtube-7Yklxo02NdU-depechemode-apainthatimusedto.mp4 Depeche Mode I guess. I haven’t heard this song before. Seems somewhat recent. I have no idea though. It could be from the 2000’s for all I know.

So yeah, the reason I’m looking for videos is because I was playing around with and it’s CoWatch feature. Users can paste in a video URL and everyone watches the same video together. If the person who pasted in the video seeks to a different timestamp, the video in everyone else’s browser is automatically synchronized. I was curious if IPFS videos would play in CoWatch, and now I know that they do!

I really love the idea of IPFS and I think the video sharing industry will as well. I’ve been reading articles about how Netflix has adopted IPFS for certain parts of their infrastructure. It makes a ton of sense for content delivery networks, because there is so much built-in redundancy and performance features to IPFS to where a video file could be served to a viewer by the closest, or fastest datacenter. Then if that datacenter has an outage, it’s not a problem because IPFS will automatically find the file from a server is still online.

IPFS is the internet as the internet should be– a redundant, distributed, decentralized, interoperable system which can survive a nuclear attack.

I heard that’s what the internet was originally created for… Is that an urban legend that I’m propagating? I have not the foggiest of ideas, and I don’t care to fact check myself right now.

I’m grateful for cute doggies, my shitty home internet, and friends.

Peace, bitches!

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